tirsdag 17. desember 2013

Turkey..

Here is a new way to prepare your Thanksgiving or Christmas Turkey.

1. Cut out aluminum foil in desired shapes.
2. Arrange the turkey in the roasting pan, position the foil carefully (see attached)
3. Roast according to your own recipes and serve.
4. Watch your guests' faces.


Unicorn...

Jammin...

You shall not pass....

Facebook...

mandag 16. desember 2013

Wisdom

Entertaining...

onsdag 11. desember 2013

Lazy....

Correct license plate

onsdag 4. desember 2013

The lions sleeps....

Always....

Mood ring....

Say it geek style

tirsdag 3. desember 2013

Please do no sit....

A good friend....

If you die...

mandag 2. desember 2013

The Rebel Bass

Candy Crush...

Are you in good shape?

Listen...

Pun classic...

Apple tatoo...

fredag 29. november 2013

Cybersex...

Birth of Philosophy

Juggling like a man....

mandag 18. november 2013

This is pure awesomeness...

What beer is for...

torsdag 31. oktober 2013

Senior citizens....

Overheard...

People says the darnest things :-)
-------------

Overheard this on a London bus:
First Woman: "I don't know what to get Fred for his birthday."
Second Woman: "Why don't you get him a book?"
First Woman: (after a moment's thought) "Nah, he's already got a book."

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At the fish hatchery where I work, we have a small display that describes the now-extinct Michigan Grayling (a kind of fish). This summer, I had the following conversation with a tourist:
Tourist: "Is the Grayling still extinct?"
Me: "Yes sir, it doesn't exist anymore."
Tourist: "Any thoughts of bringing it back?"
Me: "No, I don't think that's possible."
Tourist: "Why not?"
Me: "Because it's extinct."
Tourist: "Still?"
Me: "Yes."

Frustrated, he left.
---------

My girlfriend and I visited together with her friend in an old churchyard from the 1700s. Among the tombstones was one dated around 1725 that had fresh flowers by it.
Our Friend: "I wonder who has been here with the flowers?"
My Girlfriend: (joking) "I guess the widow has been here."
Our Friend: "Yes, I guess you're right. Who else could it have been?"

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I work as a cashier at a grocery store that was celebrating its grand re-opening. To draw customers, we were mailing out coupons for various free items, such as eggs, soda, chips, etc. The coupon for the chips was very specific: it had to be a 13 1/4 bag of Lays Potato Chips.
One lady was a bit confused. Upon handing me her bag of chips and the corresponding coupon, she said, "The coupon says thirteen and one fourth, but I guess this is close enough, right?" I checked. The net weight of the bag was given as 13.25 ounces.
I looked up, certain she was joking.

She wasn't.
----------

I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature on the credit card with the signature I just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her.

She carefully compared that signature to the one I signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.
----------

I was working in a photo store, which specializes in restoring old photographs, when a lady brought in a old picture of a man sitting behind a cow, milking it.

Her: "Can you fix this picture for me?"
Me: "Sure. What would you like us to do?"
Her: "Can you move the cow?"
Me: "Move the cow?"
Her: "I want to know what my great-grandfather looked like. That's him."

She pointed to the feet sticking out under the cow.

Me: "I don't think we can do that."
Her: "Just move the cow over, and we'll be able to see his face."
Me: "I'm sorry. We don't have the technology to do that."
Her: (getting huffy) "Well, I guess I'll just take this somewhere else."

We have passed 100 000 views!

Thank you all that have visited this site and had a laugh with me :-)
Your Awesome!

- Banzai

mandag 9. september 2013

Awesome...

Anyone seen Mike?

Facebook...

Only in America...

Rules are important...

Biig mistake....

Replaced....

torsdag 29. august 2013

Not drunk....

mandag 26. august 2013

Twilight....

fredag 16. august 2013

Your eating that??

torsdag 15. august 2013

Doing it right....

Poetic...

How to freak someone out...

onsdag 14. august 2013

Change....

Dirty fur

Trolling your girlfriend

Warning

tirsdag 13. august 2013

Facebook - Facepalms...

Matrix - home edition

Catch up...