I think...

The woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day.

One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. And you know what?"

"What dear?" she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth.

"I think you're bad luck."

_______________
Banzai Harakiri

Things That Make You Think

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person
to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

Some people are like Slinkies . . . not really good for anything,
but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the
stairs.

Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

Have you noticed that a slight tax increase costs you two hundred
dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes
a whole box to start a campfire?


You read about all these terrorists-most of them came here legally,
but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as long as 10-15 years. Now, compare that to Blockbuster: you're two days late with a video and those people are all over you. Let's put Blockbuster in
charge of immigration.


_______________
Banzai Harakiri